We have this ongoing project that is taking forever to complete. Our old house has plaster walls and plaster ceilings that tend to easily show cracks and age. The living room ceiling has a particularly large crack that spreads about half-way down the room’s length. It has aggravated Chris from day one of us living in this house. It has never bothered me.
But in an attempt to reach the millionth project mark in this house, he decided last summer to cover the ceiling with wood planks. Think shiplap, but on the ceiling.
By October, I set a goal for him of a before-Christmas completion date. Well, fast forward to today…the end of June and it’s over half-way complete. Progress, right?
So last night, in a renewed fervor, he cut and sanded boards. I wiped them down and painted. I figured I needed to jump in and play a role other than simply goal-setter. After working for a little while, we plopped down in chairs in the backyard. The sun was heading down and the mugginess from the day was beginning to subside as well.
We chatted. We talked about the cat and the dust storm we’d heard about on the news. We discussed how many windows we needed to replace in the house. We laughed about how the next day we’d celebrate 21 years of marriage. All the while we could hear our boys who had abandoned the project to go indoors. Lots of laughing and yelling. Contrary to popular belief, they are not quiet creatures.
Later as we headed for bed, I found a blob of white paint on the couch. I guess at least one of the boys didn’t leave the project soon enough. The paint discovery was the final mess of the day and one that came at the end of a long list of them from the day. I found the culprit and began fussing. Chris began scrubbing.
I lectured about the towels on the bathroom floor, the trail of milk and cereal, and now the paint. This child of mine huffed and listened and smirked as he ended the conversation with “Well, happy anniversary.” As if his offerings of spills and dribbles were a gift. They weren’t. But his words were.
As I brushed my teeth and washed my face, I leaned into the idea that the evening was a reflection of our marriage.
Lots of work. Ongoing work. Just when we think we have something finished or mastered, there’s more work.
Abundant chit chat. There’s just a lot of small talk in a marriage. Figuring out what to eat and whose socks are in the dryer. It’s really symbolic of all of the little things that end up equaling the big things in marriage. Not everyday brings a philosophical debate or life-changing excitement. But there’s a lot of contentment and happiness found in the ordinary.
Plenty of mess-ups. Literal things to clean up. But also attitudes to be adjusted and mistakes to be forgiven. But rather than letting it get all dried into the couch or our hearts, we gotta get rid of it.
The best way to end a project or a conversation or a day is with a smile, preferably some laughs.
And it sure doesn’t hurt to watch a beautiful sunset with the one you love every now and then. Marvel at the Creator who can paint such a magnificent picture. The same Creator who can take two lives and join them together. All credit to Him.
